The To's and Fro's of Nixxie

In case you are unaware I have two LJs you can find my other one if you want I randomly post on both, some buthead started reading this one early on (BTW: hi butthead. . . if your still spying my page. . .GRR) anyway, for the more me less ranty page ask me

tra la!!

Ah the leilie is up for another adventure with her Captain by her side. . .

In case your wondering, I am Leilie, and my captain, well its really hard to explain who my captain is. . . . He is amazing, He is a good man. We are young together and old together, we have our adventures and romantic interludes . . . .

He is taking me camping this weekend, I finally get to meet the "crew" of The "Cocomore De Manio" His SCA (Society for Creative Anachronisms) Pirate thingy, he isnt the Captain of that crew, Joe is the Captain of The Argonaut (a small lounging vessel that ferries our crew down the salt river) But anyway Im going camping with the pirates this weekend, so yeah it should be fun. . .I hear they are kinda crazy. . .after mexico, Im sure Im up for it :P

My lession learned

you live your life one day at a time, until you look back and realize that the person you are and the person you once were are total polar oposites. 

For me this realization came too soon, I am beginging to see all the  things in my life in a very new way, Im learning about the world all over again. It is not nearly as scarry as I have always thought it to be, the world isn't so dark and angry anymore. It is truly becoming a beautiful place, with so many discoveries waiting for me, so many adventures to be had. . .now that I am on my own, truly on my own, I have time for real contemplation, with so many beautiful disrtactions, I feel myself nearing my newest departure, I have been inching towards this for a few weeks now, playing the sinarios in my head, weighing the pros and cons, learning as much as I can, testing the limits and exposing myself to the revelation from every angle, i dont think that this new feeling, this idea is something I should hold back from. In this instance, the expression comes so naturally for me, there is no fear here, but I dont miss the fear at all, I am free of it, there must be a reason for that. To deride myself would be a backwards step. No matter where I end up, no matter what it actually becomes at least I know what is being offered to me, and I am offering the same in return, putting myself into this storm, and riding the waves, feeling the rhythim of what is just beyond the horizon, i feel the need to press on. Hand in hand, here we go. . . .

Give me a day in the sun. 
give me an hour of your time.
Give me your heart, and you'll have mine. 
Tell me the secrets of your solitude,
 teach me to out last it, 
show me how to out grow you
. . . 
Share your knowledge of confinement, 
plant me in your quarantine, 
watch me wither, watch me shake and shiver. 
The fear created by this wasteland of seclusion, 
barren region of wilds. 
Give me moments. Give me miles
. . . 
seasons trickle through the hourglass
one breathing twinkle at a time 


Time waits for no one, you have to live every moment to the fullest. Every action completed with out remorse, without regret. Don't saunter through your day as though it were your last, but live it instead as though it was your first. See the newness in all things and the beauty in things overlooked. Life is beautiful.